“And you shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.  And these words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart”  Deuteronomy 6:5-6

 

Remodeling our “house” into a “home”.

New generation

            A new day with a new beginning.

                        But they are crossing into hostile territory.

                        And Moses is prepping them for how to survive.

Keys To Survival

I.          It begins with adult and parental priority.

Moses is addressing the adults of God’s people.

A.         The place to start is with adults

In the center of spiritual survival is our personal relationship with the Lord.

Personal development of our knowledge of God and our relationship with God is at the center!

We cannot relate to others until we’ve learned to relate to God ourselves.

We can’t transmit what we do not have personally.

If we are to have healthy relationships with others

            If we are to have strong  marriages and spiritually healthy families

            we must first be developing our own personal knowledge of God

            and our relationship with Him.

“Therefore take good heed to yourselves.” {Deut 4:15a RSV}

 

B.         He is addressing parents.

The children were very important.

And transmitting personal faith and values to the next generation

     is one of the major focuses of this passage.  24/7 curriculum

But it is not the first priority.

Children were not at the center.

            Parents are people too.

“The moment a child appears in their family a lot of parents succumb to the natural temptation to live for their children. Marriage is not brought about in order to raise children. Marriage occurs in order that two people might learn how to relate to one another and to be persons as God intended persons to be. The key to marriage and to a successful home is that parents must realize that children are only there temporarily, that after they are gone the father and mother remain, and that the factor which heals and holds that home together is that they themselves become what God wants, that they learn to enjoy the privileges of being whole persons, and thus that they see to it that they are not robbed of these privileges by a mistaken enslavement to their own children.”

This passage is teaching us that parents do not exist for their children; they exist to be people before God, first of all.

 

He goes on to say…

“That means that we must free ourselves from the dependency of our children upon us. You know that when a child is born it is a totally helpless being. It can’t feed itself, it can’t change its own diapers, it can’t do anything but squall and cry and sleep and look to someone else for help. And that is a form of enslavement. Temporarily a mother and a father  to a considerable degree, become a slaves to their young children. They have to. There is nothing wrong with that, except that it must not be perpetuated. As soon as possible, we must begin to free ourselves from that dependency. We must teach the child how to take care of his own needs. That is the basic principle of child training. As soon as we can successfully do so (and of course this involves taking into account all the changes of their physical, intellectual, and spiritual development) we must relieve ourselves of the responsibility for our children, and put them out on their own as independent adults. And that, of course, is what frees them. What I am really saying is we must regain our freedom from them so that they can ultimately gain their freedom from us.  There is nothing more deadly than a mother, particularly, who lives for her children, neglecting her husband,  neglecting herself, who does not develop as a person at all, only because she is so intent on trying to raise her children rightly.”

 

C.        6:2 And he is focused on the spiritual leadership of men.

“so that you and your son and your grandson might fear the LORD your God, to keep all His statutes and His commandments”

In 1980, Dr. James Dobson said, “The western world stands at a great crossroad in its history. It is my opinion that our very survival as a people will depend upon the presence or absence of masculine leadership in millions of homes . . . I believe, with everything within me, that husbands hold the keys to the preservation of the family.”  Things haven’t gotten any better in the years since

 

ILL: A famous painting by Norman Rockwell that appeared on the cover of Saturday Evening Post in 1959. It shows a suburban family going off to church, led by the oldest sister followed by Mom who is followed by the younger sister. All three women are dressed for church. Following them is a young boy who appears to be going with some reluctance. Why the problem? At the center of the painting is dear old Dad slumped in a chair, in his pajamas, reading the paper with a cigarette in his hand. As junior walks by he casts a longing eye at his father. He’s going to church but clearly he’d rather be with his father.

 

Men, when will we learn that our actions speak louder than our words?

 

II.        Key #2:  Survival Depends on wholehearted devotion and Commitment!

“Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.”  Deuteronomy 6:5

 

A.  The Passionate Love of God

Matthew 22:35-38 “And one of them, a lawyer, asked Him a question, testing Him, “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” And He said to him, “‘YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND.’  This is the great and foremost commandment.”

The central and best known text of Judaism.  Called the Shema.

“Do I love God fully?” 

This is the starting point.

Everything else grows out from this central issue in my life.

To love well, we must love the right Person.

 

Charles Shulz, creator and author of the Peanuts cartoon characters

often conveys a message in his comic strips. In one strip he conveys

through Charlie Brown the need we have to be loved and through Lucy our inability to love one another.

 

Charlie Brown and Lucy are leaning over the proverbial fence speaking to one another:

 

CB: All it would take to make me happy is to have someone say he likes me.  Lucy: Are you sure?

CB: Of course I’m sure!

Lucy: You mean you’d be happy if someone merely said he or she likes you? Do you mean to tell me that someone has it within his or her power to make you happy merely by doing such a simple thing?

CB: Yes! That’s exactly what I mean!

Lucy: Well, I don’t think that’s asking too much. I really don’t.   [Now

standing face to face, Lucy asks one more time] But you’re sure now? All you want is to have someone say, “I like you, Charlie Brown,” and then you’ll be happy?

CB: And then I’ll be happy!

Lucy: [Lucy turns and walks away saying] I can’t do it!

What Lucy can not do, sinful as she is, God does.  What Charlie Brown needs, lost and alone as he is, God supplies.

 

God loves you and is telling you today, “He loves you!” “For God so

loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son.”

Brett Blair, Sermon Illustrations, 1999

God loves us passionately and He wants to be loved passionately.

 

B.         Mediocrity = French for ‘half way up the hill”  Story: Mt Marcy

James 1:6-8  “But let him ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. For let not that man expect that he will receive anything from the Lord, being a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.”

 

“Several decades have passed since my unforgettable days in boot camp.  But some of the lessons learned back then are still with me - lessons like listening to the right voice, like ignoring the movements of the majority, and like being disciplined enough to filter the essential from the incidental.  The ramifications of this kind of discipline have been life-changing.  They include, for example, committing myself to excellence while many are comfortable with the mediocre, aiming high through most seem to prefer the boredom of aiming low, and marching to the distinct beat of another drummer while surrounded by a cacophony of persuasive sounds pleading for me to join their ranks.” 

Charles Swindoll  Living Above the Level of Mediocrity

 

Life is a leaf of paper white

Whereon each one of us may write

His word or two, and then comes night.

Greatly begin!  though thou have time

Bur for a line, be that sublime -

Not failure, but low aim, is crime.

                        James Russell Lowell

 

James 4:7-10 

“Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.

Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.

Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Be miserable and mourn and weep; let your laughter be turned into mourning, and your joy to gloom.

Humble yourselves in the presence of the Lord, and He will exalt you.”

C.        We Must Deal with Competing Loves:

1.         The love of the present, 2 Tim 4:10

            Produces insecurity in the believer

“And a certain scribe came and said to Him, “Teacher, I will follow You wherever You go.”  And Jesus said to him, “The foxes have holes, and the birds of the air have nests; but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay His head.” Matt 8:19-20                    Personal comfort of

 

“Demas, having loved this present world, has deserted me and gone to Thessalonica”  2 Timothy 4:10

 

It isn’t only seekers who ask, “What will I have to give up?”

It is also Christians hesitating to follow the Lord wholeheartedly.

Wholehearted love always requires letting go of other loves.

 

2.         The love for possessions, 1 Tim 6:10; 2 Tim 3:2

            Produces idolatry

“And another of the disciples said to Him, “Lord, permit me first to go and bury my father.”  But Jesus said^ to him, “Follow Me; and allow the dead to bury their own dead.” Matthew 8:21-22  

Pursuing personal riches instead of pursuing God.

 

3.         The love of pleasure, 2 Tim 3:4

            Produces insensitivity, weakness and then deadness.

4.         The love of self, 2 Tim 3:2

            Produces intolerance for others.

 

Hebrews 12:1-2a “Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance, and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith”

 

Existentialist question asked by Campolo to student: “How long have you lived?”  Not how long their blood has been pumping, but really living.  C.S. Lewis: “Our age is marked by moderate vice and moderate virtue.”

                                                                        Tony Campolo, Who Switched the Price Tags

 

Miss Jones, an elderly spinster, lived in a small Midwestern community.  She had the notoriety of being the oldest resident of the town.  One day she died and the editor of the local newspaper wanted to print a little caption commemorating Miss Jones’ death.  However, the more he thought about it, the more he became aware that while Miss Jones had never done anything terribly wrong (she had never spent a night in jail, or had ever been drunk), yet she had never actually done anything of note.   While musing over this, the editor went down to have his morning coffee and met the owner of the tombstone establishment in the little community.  He poured out his soul to him.  The tombstone proprietor stated that he had been having the same problem.  He wanted to put something on Miss Jones’s tombstone besides: Miss Nancy Jones, born such and such a date and died such and such a date, but he couldn’t think of anything of significance that she had ever done. 

 

The editor decided to go back to his office and assign the first reporter he came across the task of writing up a small article suitable for both the paper and the tombstone.  Upon returning to the office, the only fellow around was the sports editor, so he gave him the assignment.  They tell me if you pass through that little community you will find the following statement on her tombstone:

Here lies the bones of Nancy Jones,

For her life held no terrors. 

She lived alone 

She died alone.

            No hits, no runs, no errors.  –C.C.  Mitchell

 

“Enthusiasm is one of the most powerful engines of success.  When you do a thing, do it with your might.  Put your whole soul into it.  Stamp it with your own personality.  Be active, be energetic, be enthusiastic and faithful, and you will accomplish your object.  Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.”    Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 - 1882)  Philosopher, essayist, and poet

Choices (used 8/27/00)

“The implications of our choices carry over into what we call lifestyles.  Individually they may seem to be insignificant, but when the mind-set of a whole culture is altered in accordance with those choices, the ramifications are staggering.”  Ravi Zacharias

 

“Heaven Help the Home.” As a place to begin, let’s consider these words by Chuck Swindoll:

Whatever else may be said about the home, it is the bottom line of life, the anvil upon which attitudes and convictions are hammered out. It is the place where life’s bills come due, the single most influential force in our earthly existence.

 

I’m sure you’ve heard it said that home is where life makes up its mind. Sometimes parents forget how powerful our seemingly small actions can be.

 

“When You Thought I Wasn’t Looking.”

When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you hang my first painting on the refrigerator,  and I wanted to paint another one.

 

When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you feed a stray cat, and I thought it was good to be kind to animals.

 

When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you make my favorite cake for me, and I knew that little things are special things.

 

When you thought I wasn’t looking, I heard you say a prayer, and I believed there is a God that I could always talk to.

 

When you thought I wasn’t looking, I felt you kiss me goodnight, and I felt loved.

 

When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw tears come from your eyes, and I learned that sometimes things hurt, but it’s all right to cry.

 

When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw that you cared and I wanted to be everything that I could be.

 

When you thought I wasn’t looking, I looked … and wanted to say thanks for all the things I saw … When you thought I wasn’t looking.

 

Joshua 24:14-15

“Now fear the LORD and serve him with all faithfulness. Throw away the gods your forefathers worshiped beyond the River and in Egypt, and serve the LORD.  But if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your forefathers served beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD.”

 

Joshua certainly understood the power of parents. As he came to the end of his life, he called the leaders of Israel together for one final message. Knowing that he is only one step from death, he sounds a call to renewal that begins with a recital of God’s blessings in the past (Joshua 24:1-13). Then he challenges the people to be faithful to God  (24:14-27). In the middle of his message we find those stirring words that have been quoted and memorized for over 3000 years, “But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord” (24:15). 

Five decisions we must make if we want our families to serve the Lord with us.

Decision # 1: Building a Grace-Based Family.

As Joshua recounts the story of the conquest of the Promised Land, he quotes the Lord who has a strong reminder to the people: Then you crossed the Jordan and came to Jericho. The citizens of Jericho fought against you, as did also the Amorites, Perizzites, Canaanites, Hittites, Girgashites, Hivites and Jebusites, but I gave them into your hands. I sent the hornet ahead of you, which drove them out before you–also the two Amorite kings. You did not do it with your own sword and bow. So I gave you a land on which you did not toil and cities you did not build; and you live in them and eat from vineyards and olive groves that you did not plant Joshua 24:11-13

 

Joshua wants the people never to forget that they owed everything to God. It’s easy to see how that might happen. After all, the Israelite army had won battle after battle,  often routing the enemy from the field. It would be natural to start thinking, “We’re something special.” But that thought is always deadly. Joshua knew that once the people took credit for their victories, they would soon turn away from the Lord altogether.

 

We ought to do with our families what Joshua does with the people of Israel. It’s a good thing to review past blessings and to make a written record of God’s faithfulness. We need to say to our children, “Sweetheart, do you remember when you were so sick and we prayed to God and you got better?” “Do you remember when Dad lost his job and we were afraid so we prayed and God gave him a new job?” “Do you remember when we prayed for Joe and Cheryl to be saved and six months later they accepted Christ?” A good memory of God’s blessings is a bulwark against backsliding.

 

Has God blessed you? Then write it down. Think often about it. Tell it to your children, your family, your friends. Pass it along so that succeeding generations can tell the story after you are gone to heaven (Psalm 145:4-5).

 

Another way to build a grace-based family is to practice generous giving. When we give liberally, we teach our children to do the same. They learn that we give because we have received and that God never stops giving to his children.

 

Finally, we build grace-based families by being quick to forgive and slow to take offense. Love covers a multitude of sins.

 

Decision # 2: Teaching My Family to Worship God.

‘‘Now fear the Lord” (Joshua 24:14a). When we think about the fear of the Lord, many people get the idea of cringing in terror. The biblical concept is much broader than that.  Fearing the Lord means having such a deep respect for God that we want to please him in all we do. One writer says it refers to the “inner devotion” that causes us to honor God.

 

How do we share this “inner devotion” with our families? In several weeks I will devote an entire sermon to this topic so my comments here will be brief. Essentially what the Puritans used to call “family religion” is better caught than taught. It is more an atmosphere than a program. When the parents truly fear God, their children will learn to fear him too. When they love the Lord, it will be natural for the children to learn to love him too. When they sing hymns, their children will learn the words. When they pray, their children will quietly pray with them.

 

I especially believe that men bear a heavy responsibility in this area. I am speaking to dads, husbands, grandfathers, great-grandfathers, and uncles. I am also speaking to young men, high school boys, college men, young single men, and older single men. Men of every age, it all starts with you. For too many years we have delegated spiritual leadership to the women while we went out into the world to make a living. We have laid a burden on the women that God never intended them to bear all alone. God meant spiritual leadership to be a shared burden, but the men must take the initiative if we truly want God’s blessing.

 

 

Decision # 3: Becoming a Student of Obedience.

“Serve him with all faithfulness. Throw away the gods your forefathers worshiped beyond the River and in Egypt, and serve the Lord” (Joshua 24:14b).

 

The word “serve” is used in various forms six times in two verses. This is obviously the burden on Joshua’s heart. Nothing mattered but this, that the people should willingly choose to serve the Lord. He specifies exactly what that means when he adds “in all faithfulness.” Every area of life must be surrendered to the Lordship of Christ. “All faithfulness” means there can be no “hidden rooms” that we reserve for ourselves. In particular it means putting aside the false gods worshipped by the pagans. Matthew Henry calls them “dunghill deities” because they have no power to save, only the power to corrupt.

 

An encouraging letter from a man serving time in the state prison in Huntsville, Texas. In the letter he shared this testimony of God’s grace in his life:

 

I am a new creation in Christ Jesus. In April 1998 Jesus came into my life. I used to have all sorts of books like Penthouse, Easy Rider, American Rodder, Playboy, Hot Rod, In the Wind. But today as I look around none of those exist only Bibles and good reading. I enjoy spending time reading the Bible. I can’t tell you how many times in my life I have tried to get what I saw others had from that Book but never did. But one of my brothers here told me to pray for understanding. Just like that, reading became joyful. My Lord has changed my life, I never could have. I praise God for saving my life by sending me to a place where he could slow me down and take me from Satan. Thank you Jesus.

 

He got rid of the gods from “beyond the River.” The old literature went out with his old life and was replaced by the Word of God and good Christian material. That’s a sign of the genuine work of God’s Spirit in his heart. It’s also a sign that he is becoming a student of obedience.

 

Decision # 4: Remembering My Spiritual Heritage.

“But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your forefathers served beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living” (Joshua 24:15a)

 

These verses tripped me up when I first read them. Then I understood that Joshua was appealing to the democratic sense of his hearers. He actually offers them a series of choices. First, the true God. Then the gods beyond the River (meaning the River Euphrates), referring to the gods of Ur of the Chaldees. Those would be the gods of ancient tradition, the moon god and the sun god. Then the gods of Egypt, meaning the gods of sun, rain, darkness, and natural disasters. Then the gods of the Amorites,  meaning the gods of fertility and sexual pleasure.

 

Make your choice, he says. If you don’t want to choose the living and true God, then go back to the false gods you used to worship. Go all the way back to Ur if you like. Strange as it may seem, some people actually prefer the gods of this world to the one true God of the Bible. Their eyes are so blinded by sin and their heart so given to fleshly indulgence that they prefer to drink from the cesspool of sin than to drink from the Water of Life.

 

Here we see the genius of biblical religion. We need not try to coerce people into serving the Lord. If they prefer some other way, then so be it. It’s almost always a mistake to crowd people too closely when we attempt to win them to Christ. “A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still.” We have nothing to fear and every thing to gain by presenting the options and giving people the right to make up their own minds.

 

Decision # 5: Choosing Daily to Serve the Lord.

“But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord” (Joshua 24:15b). This is one of the most famous statements in the Old Testament, and rightly so, because it expresses the heart of a great spiritual leader at the end of his life. In these simple words we find the will of God expressly stated. We are to serve the Lord and we are to do everything in our power to see that our family follows our example.

 

Not long ago someone asked for my advice regarding a spiritual struggle. Very simply, this person has been living like a Christian on Sunday and like a worldling during the week. I do not know all the details, and they really don’t matter, but the frustration of living a double life was obvious. What should this person do? “My Christian life is dry and dead.” I answered this way: “You didn’t get where you are overnight, and you won’t get out of this mess overnight. You must begin each day by choosing to serve the Lord, and then you must follow up that decision with a hundred small choices in the right direction.  That’s really what serving the Lord means. If it doesn’t involve the nitty-gritty choices we make every day, then we’re still trying to straddle the fence.”

 

Over 300 years ago Matthew Henry said that serving the Lord involves “serious godliness.” I like that phrase because it captures the spirit of Joshua’s words. If we are going to do what he did and say what he said, it will mean “serious godliness” for all of us.

 

question:

“Do your neighbors know that you are a Christian?

Do they know you love the Lord?” With

“Oh, why are we not bolder to speak up for him?”

 

Note several implications.

First, each of us must personally decide to serve the Lord. I can’t choose for you nor you for me. We need a generation of Joshuas who will make this choice for themselves.

 

Second, parents have a special obligation to set the right example in this area. We can hardly expect our children to serve Christ when we take our obligations lightly.

 

Third, fathers have the highest obligation. People often tell me that my boys remind them so much of me. I’m always proud to hear it but there is a heavy burden implied in those words. If it’s true that the apple never falls far from the tree, then I had better make sure the tree is healthy, or else what will the fruit be like?

 

A Time to Choose

This is a public choice.

“But as for me.” He means, “I don’t care what the rest of you do.  I’m going to serve the Lord.” Even though he was the leader of the nation, he was willing to part with his own people over this fundamental issue. I think we all have to say that sooner or later. It happens to us whether we are office workers, executives, business leaders, teachers, students, blue collar workers, or simply dealing with our friends, family members, and neighbors. If you follow Christ, there will come a time when you must say,  “Do what you want, and whatever you do I will still be your friend, but I’m going to serve the Lord.”

 

This is a personal decision.

“But as for me.” In the end it comes down to this. You must choose to serve the Lord. It won’t happen by accident and it can’t be inherited from your parents. They can give you the heritage, but at some point you must make it your own.

This is a persuasive declaration.

“But as for me and my house.” This may be the most amazing thing of all. Here Joshua speaks as the God-appointed leader of his family. He claims the right to speak for his wife, his children, his grandchildren, his great-grandchildren, and even for his servants. “As the leader of this clan, I hold their proxy in my hand. I hereby declare that my entire household will serve the true and living God.” Every Christian man ought to make a similar statement about the family God has given him.

 

This is a positive statement.

“We will serve the Lord.” This is more than a statement about forsaking other gods, though that is implied. It means that Joshua’s family will orient itself around the worship of the God of Israel. His law will be their law, his commandments will be their delight, his worship their highest goal, and his glory their ultimate aim.

 

I find it fascinating that Joshua does not say, “My house without me,” which would be like that famous Norman Rockwell painting. Nor does he say “Me without my house,” which would be a different kind of hypocrisy. Both are joined together as God intended. “I will serve the Lord and my family joins me in this pledge.”

 

How can a man be so certain about his family? I think Joshua could speak like this because he had taught them well for many years. And he knew of their own personal commitment to the same God he worshipped. And he had provided a good example for his family to follow. Let no man read these words and think that he may live a careless life and at the end of his life ask God to save his family. To live that way and then to pray desperately at the end is to presume on the grace of God.

 

You Gotta Serve Somebody

Let me ask the question this way. Can I guarantee that my three sons will follow in my steps and serve the same Lord I worship? The answer is no because God has given to each of us the ability to make our own choices. And we all know of sad cases where godly parents produced offspring who did not serve Christ. What, then, does this text mean? I think it teaches us that godly parents can tip the scales in the right direction.  We cannot guarantee what our children will do but we can provide an atmosphere of “serious godliness” that makes it easier to choose Christ than to choose the way of the world.

 

I realize that I am preaching about the family but in reality I am speaking to individuals. One of our single women said to me that this sermon applies to all of us because we need to serve the Lord if we plan to serve him later when we are married. She’s right. In the end the decision is intensely personal.

 

Is your mind made up? Are you ready to serve the Lord? Do you know where you stand with God? The application could not be clearer: “Choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve.” In the words of Bob Dylan, “You gotta serve somebody.” No one gets a free ride and no one can straddle the fence forever.

 

There is no room for neutrality. Every person needs a God and every person must serve the God they choose. If you choose not to choose, you’ve already made your choice.  You can’t choose the true God by default or by inheritance.

 

Make your choice. Cast your vote. Choose your God. I pray you will make the right choice. As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.

Dedication – Song – I Pledge My Head To Heaven

Will I pledge my head to heaven for the gospel

And I ask no man on earth to fill my needs.

Like the sparrow up above I am enveloped in His love

And I trust Him like the little ones He feeds.

 

Will I pledge my wife to heaven for the gospel

though our love each passing day just seems to grow.

as I told her when we wed, I’d surely rather be found dead

than to love her more then the One who saved my soul

I’m your child and I want to be in family forever

I’m your child and I’m going to follow you no matter what the cost

I’m going to count all things loss.

 

Will I pledge my son to heaven for the gospel.

though he’s kicked and beaten, ridiculed and scorned.

I will teach him to rejoice and lift a thankful praising voice.

and to be like Him who bore the nails and crown of thorns.

 

Will I had the chance to gain the world and to live like a king.

But without your love that doesn’t mean a thing.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Every Home a Little Church:  Deuteronomy 6:1-9; 2 Timothy 3:14-17

As the home goes, so goes the church. Everything we believe begins in the home where we learn to worship, to pray, to sing, and to read God’s Word. When Christian homes are strong, the church is strong. But when the homes are weak, the church cannot make up the difference.

 

Deuteronomy 6:7 tells us to “impress” the commandments of God upon our children. The following verses tell us how to do it: By talking about God’s Word 24-7, in the morning, at mealtimes, and in the evening before going to bed. You do it by writing the Word on the doorposts of your house. Let your home be so full of the Word that your children can’t help but see and hear it wherever they go and whatever they do.

 

In II Timothy 3:14, Paul tells his young protégé to remember not only what he had learned but who he learned it from. In this case that means his grandmother Lois and mother Eunice. Those two godly women had taught him the Word of God from infancy (v. 15). That same Word would make him wise for salvation and would completely equip him for anything he might face in life (vv. 15-17).

 

Principle #1: The Word of God is absolutely essential for the conversion of your family

It is the Word of God that makes us “wise for salvation.” I Peter 1:23 says we are born again by the incorruptible seed of the Word of God. James 1:18 says God gave us birth through the “word of truth.” Romans 10:17 adds that faith comes by hearing and hearing by the Word of God.

 

If this be true, then we can arrange it in a simple syllogism:

The Word of God is necessary for salvation.

I want my family to be saved.

I must get the Word of God into my family.

That’s clear, isn’t it? Godly parents who want their children in heaven with them must do whatever it takes to implant the Word of God in the hearts of their children.

 

This explains why the Puritans valued long sermons, family worship, catechisms, personal meditation, and Scripture memory. They understood that if the Word of God is tattooed on the hearts of children, they are much more likely to come to Christ. They thoughtfully planted the seed of the Word, knowing that in due season, they could trust the Holy Spirit to bring about a harvest of salvation.

 

Richard Baxter, a noted English Puritan pastor, said that if parents did their jobs correctly, children would be converted at home and the Sunday sermon could be used for the conversion of those outside the church. Family worship in its broadest sense is the ordinary means of family conversion

 

Principle #2: Only the Word of God can protect your family from the influence of a pagan culture.

Moses understood this well. He knew that once Joshua led the children of Israel into the Promised Land, they would enter a country wholly given over to Canaanite idolatry. How would they resist the seductive call of Baal and all his consorts? Only by adhering to the one true God, by loving him supremely, by obeying all his commandments, and by impressing those commandments on their children. Every home must become a place where God’s Word is talked about and visibly displayed. Only then would they be protected.

 

And how would young Timothy survive as he ministered in cities like Corinth, with its temple filled with willing prostitutes? Not to worry. God had given Timothy a toolbox called the Word of God. Everything Timothy needed was in there. If he remembered what he had been taught, he would find himself fully equipped even in the midst of prevailing paganism.

 

The same is true today. God’s Word can protect our families and make our children strong. If we ignore God’s provision, what fools we are. We have everything we need in the Word of God. Our task as parents is to impart it to our children. We must fasten our families to the Word of God. If we don’t, they can easily be swept away in the rushing torrent of ungodly influence.

 

Too many Christian families have abdicated at this very point. We have opened the door to every kind of ungodly influence by allowing in our home unrestricted Internet access,  unguided video rental, music that undermines our values, and television shows that attack the very things we say we believe. As a pastor I have a grave concern that too many families are neglecting this area entirely. When we welcome the world into our homes, we shouldn’t be surprised when our children find the world more enticing than the way of the Lord.

 

But where and how should we begin in instructing our children? I have three suggestions to make. They aren’t new or novel in any sense. But they are the time-tested methods that Christian parents have used for hundreds of years.

 

Here are three suggestions, each beginning with the letter S: Song, Scripture, Supplication.

A. Song

Teach your children to sing the great songs of the Christian faith. That includes time-honored hymns, gospel songs, and the many contemporary choruses. Sing to your children. Sing with them. Say the words and have them repeat after you. Use videos,  cassette tapes, and songbooks meant for children. Buy a hymnal and use it to teach your children.

 

This is not just good advice, it’s a biblical command. Did you know that God commands you to learn Christian music and to teach it to your children? Ephesians 5:19 tells us to sing to one another in psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs.

 

Here’s a concrete suggestion: Pay your children to learn hymns and choruses. I’m not kidding. That’s how Charles Spurgeon learned so many hymns. If you read his sermons,  you will find they are filled with quotations from hymns that are famous and from many that are not so well known. When he was a young lad, he went to visit his grandfather and grandmother. His grandfather greatly admired the hymns of Isaac Watts (”When I Survey the Wondrous Cross”). His grandmother offered him a penny for every hymn he could recite perfectly. He memorized so many that she lowered the price to a halfpenny and then to a farthing. Then his grandfather offered him a shilling for each dozen rats he caught and killed. According to Mr. Spurgeon, “I soon learned that rat-catching paid better then hymns. But the hymns have remained with me while those old rats have passed away.”

 

Whatever it takes, make sure your children learn Christian music because our songs contain the essence of our faith.

 

B. Scripture

Many parents use Bible storybooks to read to their children. This is good and should not be discouraged. However, I believe there is great value in reading the Bible directly to your children. Read the Psalms and the wisdom of Proverbs. Make sure your children know about the adventures of Samson in Judges, the exploits of David in I Samuel, the parables of Jesus in Matthew, and the growth of the church in Acts.

 

Take a chapter a day, or several chapters a week. When you children are young, you can do all the reading. As they get older, let them read the Bible as you listen and help them with the hard words. Whatever it takes, make sure your children hear the Word of God at home.

C. Supplication

Supplication is a big word for prayer. We need to pray with our children and for our children. They need to hear us pray and then they should pray with us. Our children will learn to pray primarily by listening to us as we speak with the Lord. They will gain a passion for prayer from us more than from any other source.

 

There are so many ways a family can pray together. You could keep a prayer journal and record your prayers and God’s answers. I know one family that keeps all their Christmas cards in a big basket. During the year they pull out a few at a time and pray for those families. Many of us use the missionary pictures on our refrigerators to teach our children to pray for God’s work around the world. You can purchase prayer journals designed for children, teenagers, and adults.

 

Make sure your children hear you praying for them. This will give them great confidence that they are loved and that they can bring their own needs before the Lord.

 

D.        Summer Camp

 

Children at the Final Judgment

In his sermon on this topic, Jim Eliff ended with a quotation from Richard Mather, a Puritan minister from the 1590s. His son was Increase Mather and his grandson the famous Boston minister, Cotton Mather, who wrote 400 books and pamphlets about the Christian faith. In one of his sermons Richard Mather imagines the voices of damned children at the final judgment speaking to their Christian parents who neglected to lead them to Christ. While his words are imaginary, the idea is not totally fanciful. Jesus himself said that one generation will rise up and condemn another one (Matthew 12:41).  Perhaps there will be a great deal of public discussion at the final judgment.

 

Here is what Richard Mather imagines that unsaved children will say to their Christian parents as they part company for the final time—one group to hell and the other to heaven:

 

All this that we here suffer is through you. You should have taught us the things of God and did not. You should have restrained us from sin and you did not. You were the means of our original corruption and guiltiness and you never showed any competent care that we might be delivered from it. Woe to us that we had such carnal and careless parents.  Woe unto you that had no more compassion and pity to prevent the everlasting misery of your own children.

 

The very thought is shocking. Can there be anything worse than to watch our children be condemned to hell? I do not know if such a conversation could in fact take place, but I do know that heaven and hell are real places and that our children are going to spend eternity in one place or the other.

 

Tilting the Scales in the Right Direction

parents in the end can’t be totally responsible for the choices their children make. All parents know that our children have minds of their own. We can’t guarantee what our children will do. But we have a sacred obligation to impress the Word of God into their hearts. What they do with it is up to them. Our responsibility is to tilt the scales in the right direction so that it is easy for our children to believe in Jesus. If we will do our part, we can trust the Holy Spirit to use the Word in the lives of our children. But if we are careless and unconcerned, we shouldn’t be surprised if our children have no interest in the things of God.

 

I urge every parent and grandparent to take my words to heart. What would God have you do? Perhaps you need to make some changes in this area. Maybe you need to be proactive and set aside a time to teach your children the Word of God. Whatever you need to do, don’t let this moment pass without committing to make your home a little church filled with joy and light where Jesus Christ is praised and his Word taught to your children.

 

If you know you should have started years ago, don’t let that thought keep you from doing what you can now. Yesterday is gone forever, tomorrow may never come, today is all you have. Do what God leads you to do and you will be blessed. The only sin would be to do nothing because you cannot do everything.

 

Fathers have a sacred responsibility in this area. Your wife can be washed away and so can your children. Build your family on the Word of God and when the storms come and the waters rise, your family will be safe because it is built on the rock that cannot be moved.

 

Convictions and Opinions

“It is imperative that a Christian learn to differentiate in his or her own beliefs between opinion and conviction.  An opinion is merely a preference in a continuum of options.  A person may prefer one color to another or one style to another.  A conviction, on the other hand, is rooted in the conscience and cannot be changed without changing that which essentially defines the person.  In a pluralistic culture, an opinion should not be given the same passion as the weight of a conviction.  Any every conviction held must be done so with the clear and required teaching of Scripture.  Once these differences are made in a Christian’s mind then a very important logical consequence follows: Every conviction that is held should be undergirded by love.

            Without the undergirding of love, the possessor of any conviction becomes obnoxious, and the dogma believed becomes repulsive to the one who disagrees with it.  The early church also lived in an intensely pluralistic culture in which it had to deliver an exclusivistic message, but the believers were distinguished and recognized by their love.  Our Lord Himself proclaimed truth in exclusive terms, terms in which there was no compromise, but He demonstrated that truth by the embodiment of a perfect love.  Being possessed of a conviction is a necessary part of following God, but doing so with love and patience are necessary handmaidens.

 

Fathers Who Lead, Mothers Who Love, Children Who Obey: 1 Thessalonians 2:7-13

This week I read part of a book by Richard Strauss on the Christian home. In one chapter he discusses seven goals for Christian parents. I found his list so suggestive that I decided to begin my sermon by repeating it here. This is what we want to accomplish in raising our children:

To lead them to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ.

To lead them to a total commitment of their lives to Christ.

To build the Word of God into their lives.

To teach them prompt and cheerful obedience, and respect for authority.

To teach them self-discipline.

To teach them to accept responsibility.

To teach them the basic traits of Christian character such as love, faithfulness, integrity, zeal, patience, and joy. [1]

As parents we want to move our children from dependence to independence. When our children are born, they are 100% dependent on us. Everything they need, we must supply. As they grow up, they learn to do more and more by themselves. Slowly the percentage of dependence drops to 80%, 50%, 30%, 10%, and by the time they are ready to leave home, they should be ready to live successfully on their own. In a spiritual sense we want our children to move from 100% dependence on us to 100% dependence on God.

 

That perspective explains the various rules and regulations that all parents put on their children. We tell them “No” now so that they will tell themselves “No” later. We give them external rules today so that years from now they will voluntarily choose to follow those rules on their own.

 

We know that parents play a huge role in shaping what their children become. As the twig is bent, so the tree is inclined. God gives us our children for 18 or 19 or 20 years.  What we do with those years will stay with them for life and ultimately for eternity.

 

What part does influence play? Godly influence by itself cannot guarantee the salvation of our children. Salvation is a work of the Holy Spirit. But God does use means. He uses godly parents to help produce godly offspring.

 

We all know that godly parents may have ungodly kids. There are Esaus and there are Jacobs. But godly parents do make a difference! Paul says “Follow me as I follow Christ.”  How many of us as parents would dare to say that to our children? Yet that is precisely what we must say.

 

With that as introduction, we turn to 1 Thessalonians 2 where Paul uses two figures of speech that help us know what it means to be godly mothers and fathers.

 

I. A Father’s Influence

“For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children,  encouraging, comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God, who calls you into his kingdom and glory” (I Thessalonians 2:11-12).

 

Not long ago I read an interesting statement about the difference between mothers and fathers. Mothers tend to worry about their children’s safety and security; fathers focus on their children’s success. A mother frets over things like tender loving care while fathers push their children hard because they know we live in a world where failure is easy and success difficult. Both are absolutely necessary in raising children and in serving the Lord.

 

I have previously mentioned the mission statement of our Allied Force high school ministry. It’s painted on the wall of the youth room on the third floor of the west wing: “Our mission in Allied Force is to be impact players in our world for Jesus Christ.” I love that phrase “impact players for Jesus Christ.” The Apostle Paul would like that. That’s why he kept moving from city to city. That’s what made him persevere in spite of opposition, indifference, death threats, and physical weakness. He wanted to see Christians become “impact players” for Jesus.

 

Being an impact player isn’t always popular with other students. I’m sure you’re aware that ever since the tragedy in Littleton, Colorado several weeks ago, there have been many copycat incidents across the country. Here’s one that didn’t make the newspapers.  During a lunch break, a group of our high school girls were holding hands in a circle and praying for a friend in the hospital. While they were praying, several others students came up and started saying, “You can’t pray here. That’s against the rules. You’re the ones we want to kill.”

 

Should this surprise us? Chuck Colson pointed out that the Columbine killers clearly included Christians among their targets. These days when parents send their kids off to school, they don’t know if they’ll ever see them alive again. Or if they’ll come home in a body bag. I’m proud of our teenagers who aren’t ashamed to pray in public and who won’t be intimidated by loud-mouth teenage thugs.

 

Paul expands the concept of a father’s influence with three phrases.

A. We Encouraged You 12a

“For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children,  encouraging … you.” The word “encourage” means to come alongside someone who is struggling and to help them out. It has the idea of seeing a runner begin to stumble as they round the last turn and head toward the finish line. Instead of simply letting them fall and finishing the race on your own, you slow down, put your arm around them, and carry them to the finish line, even if means you personally lose the race.

 

B. We Comforted You 12b

“For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children, encouraging, comforting … you.” The Cotton Patch version says that Paul was constantly “sharing his insights.” This is a most positive statement. It reminds me of the little book,  The One-Minute Manager, which exhorts bosses to “Catch Them Doing Something Right.” Most bosses are excellent at finding fault, the truly great ones love to catch their employees doing something right. Good fathers know how to cheer their kids to victory.  Although 34 years have passed, I still remember my father coming home from the hospital late in the evening where he had been visiting his patients. If he found me studying, he would usually stop, say a word of encouragement, and then give me a quarter. Something about that simple gesture stays in the mind across all these years.

 

C. We Challenged You 12c

“For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children, encouraging, comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God, who calls you into his kingdom and glory.”

 

When I was a child, I heard it over and over again, “You’re Dr. Pritchard’s son.” That meant something special in the small town where I grew up. Now I understand that as a child of God, I have an even larger responsibility to live in such a way that I enhance his reputation in the world.

 

This week I received an e-mail from Lynn Briner, the daughter of my dear friend and co-author Bob Briner. Last fall he was diagnosed with cancer. He has come through one round of chemotherapy and is in his second round now. Each time Bob and I have talked in the last few months I have been struck by his sense of peace in the face of uncertainty. In her message to me Lynn said this about her father:

 

I know that no matter what the outcome, God’s will will be done. My dad is such a faithful man, and I know that even in his suffering, he is glorifying the Lord. How blessed I am to have him for a father!

 

I do not know what will happen to my friend Bob. I fervently pray for his healing but in the end that is in the hands of God. Bob has many accomplishments to his credit but at the top of the list must be the family the Lord has given him. Children can’t be fooled.  What Lynn said about her father speaks volumes about his influence in her life.

 

II. A Mother’s Love

“But we were gentle among you, like a mother caring for her little children” (I Thess 2:7).

 

On Wednesday night someone pressed a piece of paper into my hand. It contains the following statement: “An ounce of mother is worth a pound of clergy.” It is impossible to exaggerate a mother’s influence in the lives of her children. I Thessalonians 2:7 contains a lovely picture of a young mother nursing her newborn. See how carefully she wraps him in her arms. Watch as she lifts him to her breasts. She knows the little one cannot eat on his own, cannot find food, cannot survive without her. She must not only feed him, but the food must come from within her own body. To nourish him she must give of herself.

 

In verse 8, Paul goes on to describe the extent of a mother’s love: “We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us.” Mothers make an investment in their children that fathers never understand. We dads come and go, but mothers are the ones who give themselves completely for their children. Sometimes we hear women talking about choosing between their children and their careers. But that’s a mistake. If you are a mother, your children are your career. Someone else can do your job and someone else can win that case or close that deal or teach your classes or do whatever it is you do on the job, but no one can raise your children. Mothers are quite simply irreplaceable. If you are a mother, your greatest contribution will be the children you raise for the Lord. Please don’t mistake that as a statement about working part-time or full-time or in the home or outside the home. Just remember that your children (especially while they are young) are your career. Don’t let the world suck you into its mold by making you feel “unfulfilled” if you are “just a mother.” Motherhood is a high, holy and most noble calling.

 

Beulah Skinner’s Prayers

Last month we commissioned Rob and Kim Skinner as missionaries to Ecuador with radio station HCJB. Since then Rob and Kim and their two sons, Ben and Matthew, have started a year of language training at the Rio Grande Bible Institute in Texas. After they met with the elders in February, Kim wrote me a note about the influence of Rob’s godly grandmother:

 

“I have NEVER known a more powerful prayer warrior than Rob’s grandmother. When our son Matthew was in the hospital in Virginia she called every day from Mass. for weeks - praying over the phone and “rebuking Satan!” And I mean rebuking! When Grandma prayed I held the phone a foot from my ear, so I wouldn’t go deaf! When I hung up the phone I was always in a kind of daze - like I’d heard directly from God - and any problem appeared quite small and definitely taken care of.

 

Nine months ago when we told Rob’s parents of our acceptance to HCJB and our goal of getting to language school at the Rio Grande Bible Institute in a year, Rob’s mother (who is not an emotional woman) burst out with: “Wouldn’t the Rio Grande Bible Institute love to meet the grandson of Beulah Skinner!” It turns out that Grandma (who lived in a run-down old house and lived off homemade soup and garlic - eating only when she thought of it because it took too much time away from prayer, Bible reading and phone counseling) left that school a whole lot of money. No one in the Skinner family knew a thing about the Rio Grande Bible Institute until we said that’s where HCJB sends its missionaries to learn Spanish. Rob is too humble to talk about it, but I think it shows in a remarkable way how God puts the pieces of the big puzzle together through the generations.”

 

How many of us had a praying grandmother? How many of us had a praying mother? How many of us had a praying aunt? How many of us had a praying sister?

 

There are godly mothers and grandmothers who have prayed their children all the way to Jesus. And some of them are praying their children and grandchildren to Jesus at this very moment but the kids haven’t found out about it yet.

 

Thank God for women of faith. Their prayers have changed the world.

 

III. A Child’s Choice

“And we also thank God continually because, when you received the word of God, which you heard from us, you accepted it not as the word of men, but as it actually is, the word of God, which is at work in you who believe” (I Thessalonians 2:13).

 

This is what happens when godly moms and dads work together to raise their children.  Verse 13 emphasizes the logical result of a father’s influence and a mother’s love. Many people accept Christ at an early age because their parents made it easy for them. As little children they said to themselves, “If Mom and Dad love Jesus, I ought to love him,  too.” This is precisely what should happen in a Christian home.

 

John Paton’s Testimony

In one of his sermons on the Christian home, Jim Eliff relates the following story about John Paton, pioneer missionary to the New Hebrides Islands in the Pacific Ocean. John Paton was born on May 24, 1824 in a cottage in Scotland. His parents were poor but godly. When John Paton became a young man he was offered a scholarship to the Normal Seminary in Glasgow, Scotland. Here is his account of the day he left home:

 

I started out from my quiet country home on the road to Glasgow, about 40 miles on foot and thence to Glasgow by rail. A small bundle tied up in my handkerchief contained my Bible and all my personal belongings.

 

My dear father walked with me the first five miles of the way. His counsel and tears and heavenly conversations on that parting journey are fresh in my heart, as if it had been just yesterday, and tears are on my cheeks as freely now as then whenever memory steals me away to the scene. For the last half mile or so we walked on together in almost unbroken silence. My father, as was often his custom, carried his hat in his hand, his long, flowing yellow hair stringing down his shoulders like a girl’s. His lips kept moving in silent prayer for me and his tears fell fast.

 

We halted upon reaching the appointed parting place. He grasped my hand firmly for a minute in silence and then solemnly and affectionately said ‘God bless you my son. Your father’s God prosper you and keep you from all evil.’ He never had to say any more. His lips kept moving in silent prayer. In tears we embraced and parted.

 

I ran off as fast as I could and when about to turn a corner in the road where he would lose sight of me, I looked back and saw him still standing with head uncovered where I had left him gazing after me. Waving my hat in adieu, I was round the corner and out of sight in an instant but my heart was too full and sore to carry me further so I darted into the side of the road. I wept for a time and rising up cautiously I climbed the dike to see he yet stood where I had left him, and just at that moment I caught a glimpse of him,  climbing the dike and looking out for me.

 

He did not see me and after he had gazed eagerly in my direction for a while, he got down and set his face toward home and began to return, his head still uncovered and his heart, I felt sure, still rising in prayer for me. I watched through blinding tears until his form faded from my gaze and then hastening on my way vowed deeply and oft by the help of God to live and act so as never to grieve or dishonor such a father and mother as He had given me. The appearance of my father as we parted, his advice, prayers and tears, the road, the dike, the climbing up on it, and walking away head uncovered, have often, all through life risen vividly before my mind and so now while I am writing seems as if it had been an hour ago.

 

In my earlier years particularly when exposed to many temptations, his parting form rose before me as that of a guardian angel. It is deep gratitude which makes me here testify that the memory of that scene not only helped by God’s grace to keep me pure from prevailing sins but also stimulated me in all my studies that I might not fall short of his hopes, and in all my Christian duties that I might faithfully follow his shining example.

 

Making it Easy for Your Children to Believe in Jesus

Not all of us had parents like that. And not all of us have been parents like that to our own children. No one is perfect and even the best mothers and fathers make many mistakes. Without God’s grace we would have no hope for our children or grandchildren. If we can’t change the past, we can certainly make a new start for the future. Let us here and now resolve that we will use our influence to point others to Jesus. Let each father and mother pray fervently to become the right kind of godly example. Where we have failed, let us confess it and then leave our failures at the foot of the Cross. By God’s grace things can be different from this day forward.

This sermon is subtitled “God’s plan still works today.” More than ever, I am convinced those words are true. Where fathers lead and mothers love, it will not be difficult for our children to obey.

We all know that children have minds of their own. We cannot compel our children to believe in Jesus. But by our behavior, we can make it easier or we can make it harder.  God help us to make it easy for them to follow us as we follow Christ.

Lord, grant that in an 100 years our great-great-great grandchildren will rise up and give thanks for our godly example. Thank you for the influence of many men and women who brought us to Jesus. May the coming generations walk in your path because we have followed your way. And may that road lead us one day to heaven. In Jesus’ name, Amen.