Oakbrook Evangelical Free Church

Powerpoint PDF: Dealing With Hidden Issues

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(strongly recommend for listening along with sermon MP3)

Introduction:

1. Soup / Stew – Comfort food

Throwing some things into the pot hoping that something I through in will bring encouragement and comfort.

2. Joseph!

Everyone is a problem, has a problem or will cause a problem.

Genesis 37:1f

Gen 37:5 You sold me…God sent me.

God’s will is the controlling reality in my life.

God’s truth releases the will for constructive living and emotional healing!

Genesis 45:8 ““Now, therefore, it was not you who sent me here, but God; and He has made me a father to Pharaoh and lord of all his household and ruler over all the land of Egypt. ” NASB95

Genesis 50:19 “But Joseph said to them, “Do not be afraid, for am I in God’s place? ” NASB95

Romans 8:28 viewed from the side of real life..

Romans 8:28 “And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. ” NASB95

God uses even the bad things that happen to us to accomplish His will

God’s will for those caught in hurtful circumstances like Joseph is for them to

1. Trust God completely – stop fighting! “Faith rest!”

2. Forgive them kindly

3. Embrace the truth that it isn’t about you but about God’s purposes to be fulfilled in you.

God’s kindness: Joseph got to hold his great grandchildren.

God defines normal: “all we like sheep have gone astray”

• Cain killed Abel out of jealousy and anger

• Noah got drunk and cursed his grandson

• Lot offered the sex addicts his daughter to protect his out of town guests

• Abraham plays favorites between his sons

• Isaac plays favorites between his sons

• Abraham had sex with his wife’s servant

• Isaac and Rebecca fight over which son to bless

• Jacob marries two wives and ends up with four.

• His sons intend to kill Joseph but sells him instead

• Jacob’s first born, Reuben sleeps with his father’s concubine.

• Another son, Judah sleeps with his daughter-in-law.

“These people need a therapist.”
John Ortberg

I. Why Relationships Are So Important

Genesis 1:26 “Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness” NASB95

John 17:20-24 ““I do not ask on behalf of these alone, but for those also who believe in Me through their word; “that they may all be one; even as You, Father, are in Me and I in You, that they also may be in Us, so that the world may believe that You sent Me. ““The glory which You have given Me I have given to them, that they may be one, just as We are one; “I in them and You in Me, that they may be perfected in unity, so that the world may know that You sent Me, and loved them, even as You have loved Me. ““Father, I desire that they also, whom You have given Me, be with Me where I am, so that they may see My glory which You have given Me, for You loved Me before the foundation of the world. ” NASB95

1 Corinthians 1:9 “God is faithful, through whom you were called into fellowship with His Son, Jesus Christ our Lord. ” NASB95

John 13:34-35

Relationships take work.

The greater the investment in the relationship the great the potential for joy and delight and for hurt and anger.

II. Real Hope for Real People

Colossians 1:27-29 “to whom God willed to make known what is the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory. “We proclaim Him, admonishing every man and teaching every man with all wisdom, so that we may present every man complete in Christ. “For this purpose also I labor, striving according to His power, which mightily works within me.” NASB95

2 Corinthians 7:5-6 “For even when we came into Macedonia our flesh had no rest, but we were afflicted on every side: conflicts without, fears within. “But God, who comforts the depressed, comforted us by the coming of Titus; ” NASB95

2 Corinthians 1:3-4 “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, “who comforts us in all our affliction so that we will be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. ” NASB95

Hebrews 3:7-8 “Therefore, just as the Holy Spirit says, “Today if you hear His voice, “Do not harden your hearts …” NASB95

Hebrews 3:12-13 “Take care, brothers, that there not be in any one of you an evil, unbelieving heart that falls away from the living God. “But encourage one another day after day, as long as it is still called “Today,” so that none of you will be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin. ” NASB95

The role of encouragement: English = “to build courage”

To build up inner resources

The Process of encouragement….

~ Presence…

~ Understanding…To be an encourager we must work at understanding the fears, defenses and needs of other people and become committed not only to sharing ourselves but to sharing the Lord by ministering to the needs of others.

~ Expressed from the heart…

~ Directed toward change toward godliness…

Discipleship: Becoming Christ’s Apprentice, His student, He is my mentor, He is the expert. What He says is really, really important.

Cooperate With Christ’s Work in Your Life

Definition: “Discipleship is the process of becoming and helping others become more like Christ in our thoughts, feelings, and actions.” Rick Warren

2 Corinthians 3:17-18 “Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty. “But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit.” NASB95

A. Deal With Your Fears

Psalm 56:3-6 “When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. “In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can flesh do to me? “All day long they injure my cause; all their thoughts are against me for evil. “They stir up strife, they lurk; they watch my steps, as they have waited for my life.” ESV

Psalm 56:9-13 “This I know, that God is for me. “In God, whose word I praise, in the Lord, whose word I praise, “in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can man do to me? “I must perform my vows to you, O God; I will render thank offerings to you. “For you have delivered my soul from death, yes, my feet from falling, that I may walk before God in the light of life.” ESV

2 Timothy 1:7 “For God did not give us a spirit of timidity (fear), but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.” NIV

1 John 4:18 “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love. ” NASB95

B. Speak the Truth, Face the Truth

Ephesians 4:15, 25 “but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ…Therefore, laying aside falsehood, speak truth each one of you with his neighbor, for we are members of one another. ” NASB95

Takes Courage:

Deuteronomy 31:8 ““The Lord is the one who goes ahead of you; He will be with you. He will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.” ” NASB95

Joshua 1:7 ““Only be strong and very courageous; be careful to do according to all the law which Moses My servant commanded you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, so that you may have success wherever you go. ” NASB95

Joshua 3:13 ““It shall come about when the soles of the feet of the priests who carry the ark of the Lord, the Lord of all the earth, rest in the waters of the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan will be cut off, and the waters which are flowing down from above will stand in one heap.”

C. Deal With Anger

Control Your Tongue

• James 1:19-20 “everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger; “for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God. ”

• The negative – control what I say side

An interesting phenomena

We just spit it out at our loved ones.

But, when others are there, we control what we say

Why can’t we make a conscious decision to control our

tongues all the time?

James 3:1-12 Turn and follow as I read…

• The positive – helper side (quick to hear)

Active, empathetic listening: entering into the private world of the other person becoming sensitive moment by moment to what they are saying and feeling.

Distorted listening:

Evaluative listening…listening to give advice instead of understanding

Interrupting…this means you’ve stopped listening

Keep Short Accounts

• Ephesians 4:26-27 “Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, “and do not give the devil an opportunity. ” NASB95

Release them from the debt!

Ephesians 4:32 “Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.” NASB95

D. Deal with Unfinished Business

Hebrews 12:15 “See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no “root of bitterness” springs up and causes trouble, and by it many become defiled;” ESV

1 Peter 2:1 “Therefore, putting aside all malice and all deceit and hypocrisy and envy and all slander, ” NASB95